Burning Hot

Burning for you in Sacramento
On September second,
When that fiery demon in the corner
Stretched out his hand and beckoned,
Persuading with words
That sounded so enticing,
I’ll show you where the ice cold beer is
Without mentioning his pricing.

But, Dark Lord, I said
Is this not already Hell?
The forests are all burning
I breathe that pungent smell,
The animals run amok
The people act as though they are crazy,
If you can’t top our human performance
Old man, you’re getting lazy.

Beelzebub and brother Baal
You two, are hopelessly late,
Over here on Earth
We are filled with fire and hate,
You might as well retire
And rest on your laurels,
Our leaders have already denounced
Common sense and morals.

So pondering it all
On the hot streets of Sacramento,
Hell has already arrived
Praise the Lord and Dr. Demento.

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Canine Captivity

Folks brag about their dogs
Their character and bravery,
But I propose that ownership
Amounts to abject slavery,
Dog is bound
By leash and by fence,
And if that isn’t slavery
Explain it to me, hence.

Owner might state
Well, my dog, he protects,
And then he cuts off the jewels
Denying dog to have sex,
And less likely to roam
Or be acting aggressive,
Slavery disguised
Profoundly oppressive.

 

Surreal

Surreal defined
Means bizarre,
Unreal, weird, strange
Like driving a flying car.

Let’s consider
Another interpretation,
Sir Reel
Director of movies
Earns a standing ovation.

Lastly, sue real
Instead of arbitration,
One finds you in court
The other a substation.

 

Ooze

 

I’m an oozer*
I’m not what I appear to be,
I’m an oozer
I’m bleeding out, oh, can’t you see.

I had a Heart cath
And
I almost died,
The doctor promised
That he’d save me,
But he lied.

I’m an oozer
My blood is dripping on the floor,
I’m an oozer
My doctor’s sneaking out the door.

If I should die
I will haunt
That S.O.B.
And I’ll make sure
He won’t forget
Poor little me.

I’m an oozer
I’m not what I appear to be,
I’m an oozer
I’m bleeding out, oh, can’t you see?

*(Sung to the Beatles song, “I’m a Loser”)

Corner

Corner the market
Corner the rat,
Corner the corner
If that’s where it’s at,
That’s how it is
And that’s how it stays,
Corner your lover
Till the end of all days.

Synchronize

If you synchronize
You might win the prize,
It is merely a suggestion, little bear,
Open your eyes
And silence your cries,
Your reward is just sitting over there.